ManWithPez

The only job that Chuck's past career has prepared him for.

The constant butt of jokes around here Chuck Norris reached the age of 70 last week, and there’s no reason we should stop making fun of him.  I mean, what’s he going to do?  Slap me with his walker (Texas Ranger)?  Heh. It would appear that Chuck has come up against an adversary that he can’t simply kick into submission.  So, as we all fall to the enemy that is time, let’s take a look at how Chuck will deal with this particular bad guy who isn’t a motorcycle thug or a ninja.  Chuck vs. Old Age after the jump. (more…)

Ohhh...so that's where rollergirls come from.

I’ve fallen a little behind in my postings.  Perhaps it’s because I’m getting older.  Perhaps it’s because my daughter’s getting older.  Both are reasons to be driven to distraction, but I’m trying to get on top of things again.  I have to say that it was easier to find daddies and their girls than it was to find fathers and sons.  Maybe because the dynamic offers so many ways to be more dramatic.  It’s like my father told me when he found out I was having a daughter “When you have a son, all you have to worry about is that one boy.  When you have a daughter, you have to worry about all the other boys out there.”  Right or wrong,  fathers and daughters in popular media make for compelling viewing.  Some of my favorites after the jump. (more…)

He cares about as much as I do about my birthday.

Last week was my son and my mother, this week is my daughter and my exwife.  This weekend, it’s mine.  Birthdays!  They’re everywhere, and while mine usually don’t bother me, this one, the 35th, isn’t shaping up to be my best ever.  No worries, however.  I’ve usually tried to not to be irritable on my birthday, but it’s far too easy to annoy people on the day they move up an age bracket.  Here’s ten ways to push the envelope, but remember, if you poke a sleeping dog with a stick, you deserve what’s headed your way.  Ten new ways to annoy people after the jump. (more…)

Talk back to me again, and you'll be riding high tide, you got that?

Today is my son’s birthday.  In honor of this, I’m going to write a little piece about some of my favorite father/son relationships.  However, as is my wont here at ManWithPez, none of these are what you’d consider traditional father/son relationships, ohhhhh no.  In fact,  only one pair is actually blood related.  Having said that, I think we’ll do without the typical rank structure I usually employ with these types of lists, and just jump in.  Who’s ready?  I know I am, and before I go on…Happy 7th, Alexander.  Daddy is very proud of you.  Fathers and sons after the jump. (more…)

Not the toad I meant, bu...ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!

You know, ThatCostumeGirl and I argued over whether or not to call this group of people Lackeys or Toadies.  Turns out, they mean almost the same thing, really.  There is enough difference, however, that it looks like she won.  So, Toadies it is!  Besides, it’s the cooler sounding term anyways.  Now, there will be some on the list that you disagree with.  Indeed, there are some that start out as toadies, and then distinguish themselves otherwise further in the story.  For however brief a time, however, they were all in glorious servitude, and happy to be so!  So, here they are in rank order:  My Favorite Toadies, after the jump! (more…)

Look at her! She's just begging to be annoyed!

Yes, yes, children are little people too.  Little, loud, snotty, annoying people, too.  I oughta know!  I’ve helped created two of them!  And, it just so happens that their birthdays are forthcoming.  So, get ready to see a post or two devoted to them.  Children annoy me so much that I think of it as a public service to help other in finding ways to bug the little turd droppers.  Now, tread carefully here.  Invariably, you will be called immature for trying to get under the skin of someone much younger than you.  Screw that!  As far as I’m concerned, they have it coming, what with they’re trying to figure out how the world works and their innate curiosity.  The NERVE!  Ten New Ways to Annoy the young after the jump. (more…)

You come in here trying to take my money?! You get burned.

I like dragons.  There, I’ve said it, and I don’t care what the rest of you think.  As a child, I used to sit and doodle dragons all the time.  I think a lot of us did.  Mine were a little strange, though.  I had all the firebreathing, scaly representations you normally see, but some of mine had dog’s heads and bird’s heads.  I had read that Chinese dragons took all kinds of strange forms, and I drew things like that.  The fish head dragon, I’m happy to say, remains buried for everyone’s sanity.  In doing research for this article, however, I”ve found that the dragon seems to by underrepresented!  So, here’s my personal list of my favorite dragons.  I’m certain you won’t agree with some of these, but feel free to tell me yours!  Dragons, after the jump! (more…)

Photo from the "Shut Your Damn Mouth" school of conflict resolution.

This is my blog.  There are many like it, but this one is mine.  Therefore, I’m going to air some old aggravations on it.  Now, if you use any of the phrases or words I’m about to ridicule, don’t worry.  I already know that much of what I say could be called into like scrutiny, and I’m fine with that.  Also, when I hear these things, I roll with it.  Just know that deep within me, my nerd teeth are gnashing much like a rabid beaver when they’ve got ahold of a particularly nasty bit of wood.  What pisses me off after the jump! (more…)

Reference for #2 down on that list. I'll say it again...DAMN!!!

Damn!  Go a week without kicking Chuck Norris’s ass, and people will notice.  So, here it is, because YOU demanded it!  You know…I just hadn’t noticed that we hadn’t had a woman fight Chuck Norris on one of these outings.  Actually, that’s not true.  A lot of thought went into picking who was going to take on Chuck’s brawn and beard this week.  I could’ve gone with any old piece of nerdbait cheesecake(mmmm…cheesecake).  But, instead, I decided to go with a badass chick that none of us can deny.  Sigourney Weaver vs Chuck Norris after the jump. (more…)

It’s still one of my favorite cartoons!  Justice League Unlimited seems, sometimes to make better fiction with the DC Universe’s characters than DC does.  Actually, it doesn’t seem that way…it is that way!  So, let’s have a look at some of the characters and who I would cast in some of the bigger roles.  Granted, I’m not going to cast them all, because that roster is huge!  I’m going for some of the key people.  So, JLU Casting Call after the jump! (more…)