Huey Lewis said it best "That's the power of love."

Upfront I should tell you that I’m a huge fan of the Scott Pilgrim books.  They’re brilliant, fun, and ring alarmingly true at times.  You can tell they hit a chord with Edgar Wright, who directed the new Scott Pilgrim vs. The World movie.  What hath Edgar wrought this time?  Find out after the jump.

I’ve had high expectations for this film ever since I heard it was being made.  I thought the casting of it was brilliant, and the trailers only strengthened that view.  For the most part, I was not let down.  Michael Cera plays Scott Pilgrim, a Canadian who’s a little simplistic, very romantic, and just a bit selfish.  The object of his affections at the movie’s beginning is Knives Chau, a Chinese 17 year old who’s far too young for Scott.  Why is he with her at all?  His exgirlfriend Natalie dumped him right before she became the famous singer, Envy.  Seemingly Scott dates a much younger girl because it’s simple and she adores him.  Scott glances Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) and falls head over heels for her.  I don’t blame him!  Have you seen this woman? 

First, what you might expect.  It’s  quirky, Michael Cera is awkward, and there’s plenty of stunt casting going on.  Scott soon finds out that he must defeat Ramona’s seven evil exes if they are to be together.   The fights with the seven exes are the highlight of the film, as you find out early in the first battle.  Michael Cera, I have to say does not disappoint as an action fighter.  Can you believe that shit?  Not only that, but Edgar Wright seems to abondon his usual Sam Raimi bag of tricks to make something new and compelling. 

The seven exes are great, too.  My favorite, however, was the first.  Satya Bhabha as Matthew Patel, who clearly takes his role as Ramona’s first ex boyfriend very seriously.  His fight scene with Scott is brilliant, as he even conjures up demon hipster chicks to aid him in his little song and dance fight number.  Chris Evans is great as is Brandon Routh and Mae Whitman as several more of the League of Evil Exes.  As was foretold in the trailer, Jason Schwartzman is on hand to play Gideon, Ramona’s ex and Scott’s final big boss battle.  That’s not just a phrase I’m throwing out there.  The entire movie is filled to the brim with vide game references and all are used to great comic effect.  Also brilliantly played is Wallace, Scott’s gay roommate, performed quite tongue in cheek by Keiran Culkin.  This kid is awesome, and damn near steals the show, as his character in the comic almost did likewise.  I mean, for me, anyways.

That’s all on the good side of the ledger.  On the bad, for me, is that the first half of the movie plays out very closely to the book.  To a detriment.  The books have a rich and diverse supporting cast, but not all of them should have been around for the movie.  This aspect of it made things a little confusing.  It would almost seem that Mr. Wright only had a vague idea what to do to finish his movie, and while it’s serviceable, for me, it isn’t Scott Pilgrim.  the introduction of Nega-Scott, a big deal in the comic, is thrown in here for a two second laugh.  See, that’s the point of the comics, is that Scott Pilgrim is his own worst enemy.   The book shows Scott try to get his life together, succeeding and failing in turns, and those parts, for me, were just as compelling as the fight scenes and videogame references.  Here, they are given short shrift.

The bottom line?  Go see it!  I had a blast.  This is such a fun movie…especially if you’ve never read the books.  After that, however, do yourself a favor and read Scott Pilgrim.  Enjoy the books as a seperate entity, and I think you’ll enjoy the film a great deal more.  Edgar Wright’s visuals are vibrant, and you can tell, not only is he a huge Scott Pilgrim fan, but he knows how to apply a love of videogames to his movie.  Not surprising, as he did so on his show Spaced several times to equally cool effect.  Go, have fun, and remember, if you’re going to fight over a woman, make certain she’s worth fighting for!  I know I’d fight for Ramona.

Worst. Duel. Of The Fates. EVER!

Pop media is full of relationships between men that, while occasionally having sexual overtones, really just boil down to the fact that these characters are the kinds of friends that would bail each other out of jail no matter what the other one’s done.  One such relationship, and one of my favorites is the one between Simpsons supporting characters Lenny and Carl.

You almost never see them apart, and it would appear that Lenny has a huge crush on Carl.  That’s not to say that they’re gay.  Both men have admitted that they have families, though they’ve never been shown.  Lenny has been shown to be one of Springfield’s greatest citizens, once throwing a party for all his friends when he won the lottery, and buying each one of them a Roomba as a gift.  Carl has a Masters in nuclear physics, and is rumored to be one of the best looking men in town.  They are perennial barflies at Moe’s Tavern, where they are seen more than anywhere else.  They are often shown at work at the power plant, and they only indication of their actual jobs (besides Carl once being named a junior exec) was Lenny answering customer service calls.

What I like about these two is that while they’re shown together most of the time, they’re not afraid to let the other know just when they’ve become annoyed with them.   Part of the above board writing on The Simpsons, I feel is that the writers have been able to generate emotion for these two on matter what the situation.  I love it when I see them pop up in a scene, mostly because Lenny is so sincere and Carl is such a smartass.  Lenny and Carl!  May they keep entertaining me for year on end.

Oh God! Make it STOP!!!

I shouldn’t be doing this.  I’m letting you all peek under tha armor a little too much this time.  Then again, anyone who has read this site much probably knows all about how to annoy the living hell out of me.  Here’s a list concerning the things you might not have seen yet.

1.  Divorce me.  Come on!  All the cool kids are doing it!

2.  Turns the pages in a book I own too roughly.  The future librarian in me is just waiting to hit you with a ruler.

3.  Insist that animation is not a viable form of entertainment for an adult.  What are you?  A child?

4.  Ask me to explain Firefly to you.  I just don’t think I can answer that question anymore.

5.  Improperly load a Pez dispenser.  Is ManWithPez gonna have to choke a bitch?

6.  Insist that Americans are lazy, oafish, obese, stupid, loud assholes.  Of course we are!  We rule this fucking planet.  How would you be?

7.  Make the following statement:  “I just don’t watch TV.”  Shut your lying ass up!  This is only a viable thing to say if you don’t own a television.  Otherwise, you’re just preening for the masses.  Let me know how the new Dancing with the Stars turns out, okay?

8.  Be a child that I didn’t father.  I’m sorry…I know it’s horrible, but that’s just the way it is.

9.  Stand me up.  Ladies, I’m looking at you.  Not anyone in particular.  All of you!

10.  Be Tobey Maguire.  He just irks me.

There.  That’s how you can annoy me.  Imagine it.

It’s pretty easy if you try.

So pretty he makes me sick.

Man, it’s good to be back!  Anyways, let’s take a more streamlined look at two deserving Hot Nerd Crushes:  Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Anna Torv!

Joseph Gordon-Levitt is a pretty, pretty man.  I’m secure enough in my manhood to say that, and I haven’t even seen Inception, which appears to have led to a lot of renewed interest in this young man.  I think he’s one hell of an actor, as he demonstrated at a very young age on 3rd Rock From the Sun.  As a boy, he held his own against three of the biggest hams on television!  More recently, he was brilliant in 500 Days of Summer and I just saw him the other day in a little known gem called Brick.  Check him out in these amazing films and then come back and tell me that you don’t have a little mancrush on him.

Damn your watermark, Esquire!!!

Anna Torv is flippin’ gorgeous!  Unfortunately her star making turn as FBI Special Agent Olivia Dunham on the fanstastic science fiction show Fringe rarely showcases just how beautiful this foreign knockout is. (Australian, I think).  When she turned up at the Emmys last year in that red dress and a set of heretofor unseen boobies, I was floored.  Granted, having her parade around in the buff would take away from the character on the show, but, honestly, throw the nerds a bone here!

Marvel at my son’s acting abilities!  Okay, so the fact is that he didn’t want to be in the video, and I’m afraid it shows, but, by all means, please enjoy this, the last of our summer horror movie parodies.  We had fun, and I hope you had fun watching them.

I told you I’d be back sometime in August, right?  Well, here I am!  For better or worse, actually.  Anyways, Fall is approaching, and, for my money, that’s when the best movies of the year come out, the weather is the best, the holidays get a lot cooler, and people tend to not notice a drunk man standing in a parking lot because they’re too busy being cold.  Sorry about your parking lot, by the way, whoever’s random parking lot that was.  We’re in preparation for a few things around here.  The 30 horror movies of October have to be chosen, the crowning of Miss ManWithPez 2010 must commence, and the maiden voyage of my unsinkable ship, “Peztanic” takes place in November.  Okay, only one of those things is going to happen.  Stick around, though.  I’m happy to be back, and I hope to update with more frequency.  Of course more than zero is a big jump up in anyone’s book.  See you around!

The Descent, to me, is one of the most terrifying films, I’ve ever seen.   My children absolutely love it.  When we starting doing this film short series, they requested that we do a parody of The Descent.  We came up with this one on the fly, but I still love the results.  I hope you like them too.  They were very pleased with this one, mostly because it was shot inside of ten minutes.

The last name in entertaining vacation themed films.

Tomorrow begins a week long vacation for me and my family.  The only problem is that I haven’t been on vacation with my family in over ten years.  Also, I just wanted to apologize for the lack of updates just lately.  I’ve been very busy with my children this summer, and I expect things will pick up in August.  I love you guys, though.

Nah, I’m kidding.  Fags!  Heh.

If you had a red haired daughter, what Stephen King parody would you film?  Carrie gets a going over from Canes Venatici, but not too roughly, because that telekinetic young lady scares me!  Anyways, this is the fourth of our summer film series, but not the last.  hang in there for more in the coming weeks.  You seem to like them, and we love doing them.

The truth's the truth. You can await my young adult series "Go Fuck Yourself" being published any day now.

Okay, it’s been pretty obvious that I can’t stand the cultural phenomenon that has become Twilight.  However, I never knew I would draw as much ire over it as I have.  Twilight sucks, and really, that’s all there is to it.  It’s fans though, are another matter altogether.  Having been immersed in science fiction/fantasy/horror fandom for years and I’ve been around Star Wars fanatics, Trekkies, Browncoats, Whedonites, etc, etc, etc…and I’ve never seen anything to match the hatefulness and spitefulness of these Twihards.  So, let’s get started poking the hornet’s nest one more time!

1.  Walk up to someone wearing a Team Jacob shirt and ask ‘What’s it like to have to hots for someone who probably has fleas?”

2.  If you ever happen to see Edward Cullen out and about, ask him if he’s tired from mentally abusing his underage girlfriend.  It must be hard work, after all.

3.  Slap Bella across the face.  I don’t have anything to add to that.  That bitch needs a good slappin’.  Then again, she’d probably fall in love with you for it.

4.  If you meet someone who has named their children after someone from this series…kill them.  Their children are better off as orphans after their parents have clearly tried to stunt their emotional growth in such a way.

5.  Ask Edward Cullen if he feels ashamed for not being able to pull off hair product like Angel without looking totally gay.

6.  See if you can boil water on a collection of the Twilight werewolves, because they’re so hot (temperature wise).  When you fail to do so, tell them all to put on a fucking shirt already.

7.  See if you can menace one of the Cullen with a pair of plastic vampire fangs.  When you accomplish this (and you will), say “See!  It’s not that hard to be a scary vampire!”

8.  Just mention that you don’t like Twilight.  When whatever twi-fan is hanging around you starts on their normal bullshit, say “It’s not because I didn’t give it a chance.  It just sucks.”  Leave while they’re trying to convince you.

9.  Go to see Eclipse.  Turn to the person next to you and loudly say “So, where’s Gary Busey?  Isn’t he in this movie?  Doesn’t he have a silver bullet?”  Then go home and take a shower to wash your sins away.  Even if you went to see it as a joke, you’ve still seen it.

10.  The next positive review from some lame ass Twihard about Eclipse you hear, grab the front of their shirt and scream in their face “IT’S A SHITTY MOVIE BASED ON A FUCKING TERRIBLE BOOK SERIES!  IT’S NEVER GOING TO BE GOOD!!!  EVER!!!” 

Personally, if I hadn’t had trouble with friends, old acquaintances, family, etc, giving me shit for disliking this terrible thing, I wouldn’t have written this.  It is a simple fact that I will never, ever like this.  I gave it a chance, and came away thoroughly disappointed.  So, please, save it.  I don’t care what you have to say about Twilight.  In my opinion, it’s fucking terrible, and will always be that way.  End of story.