A Word on Cloning (Spider-Men, That Is.)
Saturday, December 5th, 2009
Oh, like you wouldn't make out with yourself?
Nerds the world over have united on one thing in recent years. That the retcon pieceashit Brand New Day in Spider-Man over at Marvel Comics is the worst thing to happen since the Clone Saga. Admittedly, I haven’t read much of Brand New Day. Why? Because it shits all over one of the best relationships in comics. But, my real problem with the above statement is (sigh, I kinda hate to admit this) I LIKED the Clone Saga. Find out why after the jump.
If you’re a Spider-man fan, like me (though not recently), you’ll remember a couple of things. Mark Bagley was in the middle of his remarkably long and quality run on Amazing, and Tom Lyle (One of my favorites as well as a hell of a nice guy) was over on Spider-Man. It was a hell of a good time to be a Spider-Man fan! It was just before and during the Clone saga that several characters got introduced that I simply wanted to keep watching. I LIKED Ben Reilly! You know why? After several years of watching Peter try to be a family man, trying to balance his love life and his alter ego, his job and his aunt, etc, Peter Parker had found balance and his life was going…well, it was going good for him. Now, I ask you…Is that why you read Spider-Man? When I was a kid, I read Spider-Man because of what was going WRONG in his life, not what was going right. If Peter was unhappy (and I hate to say this, but it’s true) then the story was so much better. Having settled down with his wife, getting ready to have a baby, etc. It needed a shakeup, and Ben Reilly (the REAL Peter Parker…naw, I’m kidding, and if you thought Marvel was going to leave things that way, then you must have seen Brand New Day coming, because I didn’t.) was just the thing. He had money problems, girl problems (big ones), bad guy problems, and hair problems. I liked blonde Ben, too. It took Spider-Man back to a place I enjoyed after years of things getting kind of boring.
Talk to the hand. The huge, huge hand!
Also, along came Judas Traveller. Now, at full strength (if you want to call it that) he seemed like an unstoppable foe. His first appearance really messed with me, because I had no idea how Peter was going to beat this guy. But, that was the thing, right? Peter and Ben, though one was a clone of the other were completely different people. Now, I don’t know about you, but most of the clone stories I’ve seen in pop fiction revolve around the clones being absolutely like the original. Ben comes to town, and who does he take out, immediately? Why, none other than the enemy that Peter has arguably had more trouble beating than most, Venom. Ben does it in record time. How? Because he doesn’t think like Peter. And, I loved any story were Peter and Ben had to work together.
Sorry, if it's not The Big Red Machine, I can't recognize him as a Kaine.
Things weren’t always slick on the clone front for the clone’s creator, The Jackal. He made a few mistakes. Most notable with his first stable, but deformed clone of Peter, Kaine. Kaine’s face was mangled, and his Spider-powers had evolved in strange and interesting ways. His spider sense was now a limited precognitive ability (he could see some, but not all of the future), and his wall crawling ability could now burn people and objects. He was also much bigger and stronger than Ben or Peter. I’ll be honest with you. I could have read an ongoing Kaine title for years and not tired of it. He was what kept me going during the darkest of the Clone Saga.
Wonder what he keeps in those pouches? Spider Condoms?
So, overall, I did enjoy the Clone Saga. Right up until the very climatic end where Ben bites is in a fierce battle with Norman Osborne. I realize that this puts me in the minority of comic book geeks, and I can live with that, so long as none of the other ones tries to stab me in the back with a Goblin Glider. Yes, the Scarlet Spider’s hoodie costume was a little goofy, falling under that weirdest of 90s comics occurences, “Pouch Envy”! Hey Ben! That’s why Peter had that silly ass belt with those compartments. So he didn’t look like a total tool. Then again, his Spider-Man proper costume redesign was kinda cool, and went on to better things over in Spider-Girl (A comic whose early years, I can’t recommend enough).
Web Shooters on the outside, eh? Think I'll start wearing my boxers on the outside too.
So, playa hatas…quit hatin’ on the Clone Saga. I’m not even going to say it wasn’t that bad. I thought it was fucking awesome, and if presented with it again, I’d read the hell out of it. My only real regret in the whole thing was that they didn’t keep Ben Reilly around longer. There, I said it, and I’m glad it’s off my chest.
Tags: Spider-Man
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