New Ways To Annoy People #6
Friday, November 13th, 2009
It annoyed me to even find this goddamn photo!
Man…is it Friday again? I do love writing these. Just as soon as someone pays me to do so…I’ll write them every damn day! (HINT, HINT…MuthaF’n HINT!) Then again, perhaps I’ll end up in Hell for teaching others to annoy their fellow human beings. That’s okay. I’ll just take the time to annoy Satan himself. How hard could it be?
1. Go to the local pest control company and threaten them with grave harm if they ever happen to kill Danger Mouse.
2. Take the mic at the local karaoke bar and hum the song you requested. When asked, simply say “No, I can’t sing!”
3. Make a large order at a sushi bar. When they bring it, scream out that you didn’t know that sushi was actually raw fish.
4. On casual Friday at your office, bring a lightsaber.
5. Thank a gynecologist/urologist for “Keepin’ it real.”
6. No matter what question is asked of you in a day, answer “42“. Offer no explanation for this.
7. Practice with your throwing stars at church.
8. Run out of a retirement home yelling “ZOMBIES!!!” at the top of your lungs.
9. The next time you call in sick for work, tell them you have “the vapors”.
10. Roam around in the air conditioning ducts at work. If someone asks, tell them you’re familiarizing yourself with them in case Hans Gruber ever shows up.
Posted on November 13th, 2009 at 7:58 pm
42 is my default answer ever since I used it at an academic team meet and won the point. Freaky.